Stifled...

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Brunei...

I'm leaving for Brunei tomorrow. My flight's on the 16th, but it's a 2.30AM flight, so I'll have to reach the ariport by midnight, meaning I'll have to leave home tomorrow night.

First time I'll be leaving home for so long. I'll only be back on the 31st. They say it's tough, but the real tough thing is leaving Jen behind. I'll miss her, I know. To make things worse, she's ill and her stubborn refusal to see a doctor is not giving assurance of her getting better. How can I go there, leaving her behind when she's like that? Sigh...

Anyway, Brunei. A lot has been said about it. How the food sucks, how tough the training is, how fucked-up it is to climb Mt. Biang with all the fucking load, how annoyed you'll feel having to walk after crossing a stupid river. I'm not sure if I can take it mentally. I'm not even sure if I can take all that shit physically, but I'll do my best. I'm not gonna become some fucked-up officer.

Damn. It's kinda freaking me out. In 2 days' time I'll be in some jungle away from home, with little water and fucking food that probably not fit for human consumption. I'll be drinking fucking mud water from streams, sleeping in the forests where bugs and creepy crawlers will start having field trips on my body.

One of the exercises will even last for 6 days. Fuck. I can't imagine the damage my body will have to withstand there. Well, that's how sad my life is. It's a drag, but it still has to go on...

End...

Hanged @ 11:00 AM