Stifled...

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

He...

He has no friends. He has no one he can talk to, no one to tell his problems to. He grew up without trust, with hatred, with all his frustrations bottled up in him. He doesn't want to bother others with his problems. He has nowhere to go, nowhere to stay.

He seemed to have lost his ability to love, or maybe his desire to love. He only has lust. He lusts after almost all the girls around him, but he could not find a shred of love in himself. Maybe he only loves himself. Had the love for money change him? Or was it the betrayal years ago?

He committed a despicable act yesterday, an act that even he despises. Something took over him. He hurt her. She looked into his eyes and called him a bastard. She questioned his action. He knows the answer, but he doesn't want to face it. She kissed him. He felt nothing.

His mind is like a ball of steel wool. Incoherent, confused. He doesn't know what he wants, doesn't know what he thinks, doesn't know what he feels. He probably doesn't wanna know at all.

He recovered well, maybe too well. That made him feel inhuman. He listens to sad ballads in a vain attempt to link up with his humane side, but that only made him realise how heartless he has become. He tried to wallow in self-pity, but was too arrogant to allow it. He tried to force tears out of his eyes, but the only thing in his eyes is emptiness, coupled with a hint of hatred, for himself.

They say only those who really loved before know how to cry. What does that imply of him? He seems like a good person to people around him, but is he really a good person? Who is he deceiving? Himself? Or the world?

He wears a ring, not out of love, but because he loves the colour. He is devoid of feelings, except for superficial expressions. He is strangled. He is choked. He is stifled. He needs to be saved.

He is...

End...

Hanged @ 12:15 AM